![]() ![]() “People who would normally not have had these thoughts in their heads are doing this because of dating apps” The media, finally, is criticizing the moves of Big Tech, and we’ve come to realize that this is a really big problem in all of our lives, and we all need to go a little Upton Sinclair on this. We’re in a techlash, which I think started around 2016 or 2017 with Cambridge Analytica and the congressional hearings. Do you feel vindicated at all that in the six years since, people have been a lot less sympathetic to Big Tech? Your 2015 Vanity Fair story “Tinder and the Dawn of the Dating Apocalypse” was one of the first viral articles that pushed back against the idea that dating apps were a net good to society. NEGATIVE NANCY LYRICS HOW TOIn my interview with Sales, we talk about how dating apps make us feel terrible, and discuss some ideas on how to make the internet a more tolerable place for women. The result is an intensely personal (and incredibly juicy) retelling of Sales’s life as a marquee writer at New York magazine and Vanity Fair, replete with media gossip and detailed sex scenes that make it impossible to put down. ![]() Nancy Jo Sales Courtesy of Hachette Books These are the subjects of Sales’s latest book, a memoir titled Nothing Personal: My Secret Life in the Dating App Inferno, in which she also recounts her childhood and the many instances of sexual assault she underwent as a young woman, combined with analysis of the depressing state of sexual violence and oppression that social media, she argues, exacerbates. A single mom in her 50s, she reported finding particular success on the apps with young men in their 20s, some of whom turned into exciting trysts, others awkward sexual partners, and one a life-altering heartbreak. Yet throughout her years reporting the story, and later her book American Girls: Social Media and the Secret Lives of Teenagers and her documentary Swiped: Hooking Up in the Digital Age, Sales became one of Tinder’s most enthusiastic power users. Instead of offering real, human connection with a single swipe, Sales argued that dating apps were simply turning up the dial on hookup culture, and hetero women were once again left to work out the mental gymnastics to convince ourselves that, actually, this was good. But it wasn’t really about Tinder per se it was about how Tinder and dating apps like it were ushering in a new, dystopian romantic landscape in which sex was the result of an algorithm and relationships were almost never actually formed. In 2015, the journalist Nancy Jo Sales - she of The Bling Ring and many a buzzy celebrity profile in the ’90s and aughts - published an article about Tinder. ![]()
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